BELGİN AKALTAN - [email protected]
Famous singer and TV star Seda Sayan was once again fined by the Radio and Television Supreme Council (RTÜK), the regulatory body for Turkish television. The producers of her popular morning show, “Seda Sultan” on TV 8, were fined 18,000 Turkish Liras.
Doctor Cem Keçe, head of the Turkish Sexual Health Institute (there is such an institute and I’m just hearing it now, good for me!) was a host on the show, as well as regular guest and commentator writer Funda Özkalyoncu, together with singer Berna Arıcı. The topic of the show was “sex in marriage.”
It is believed that the doctor’s statements such as “Jacuzzis increase women’s sexual wishes and desires,” and “You can make love to your husband while fantasizing about your neighbor,” were the cause of the fine.
I will give you the details of the conversation indeed but first I want to tell you which side I am on. I agree with RTÜK in their justification, which reads, “The fact that infidelity toward the spouse is advised, even if it is only at a mental stage, is in contradiction with our family values. Consequently, these kinds of suggestions are contradictory to public decency to such an extent that in our society they are not to be brought up as a thought let alone as a fantasy.” I agree with them totally. Women and girls in Turkey (yes, women and girls – and widows) do not fantasize; they do not masturbate. They are all good girls. With three children.
Keçe said during the conversation that jacuzzis were good for women: “With warm and pressurized water, it means that we are letting go of ourselves. And that is good for sexual desire because women’s love muscles expand. More blood flows there and correspondingly, there is desire.”
Keçe was answering a caller when he said, “It is possible for a woman to have her body ready for sex
by way of touching herself and having fun while touching. Being a widow does not mean you should exclude sex
from your life. It is possible to keep the body ready for sex. Until somebody new comes into your life, please do not shut your doors to sex. Touch yourself. There are ways to do this, you know, but what is important here is that if you do not do this, if you suppress these desires, then you may not feel anything toward a man. For this reason, please, there may not be a man in your life, but do not close yourself to sexuality.” Happiest moments in a jacuzzi
The other guest on the show, Berna Arıcı, said a friend of hers was alone for three years and she was relaxing in her jacuzzi, living the happiest moments of her life there. Upon this comment, Keçe said, “It is good for her soul also. Plus, because it creates a warmness and relaxation in the sexual parts, because it creates pressure, sexual desires increase.”
“Most probably she was holding warm water to some of her parts,” Keçe added.
Then a commercial break began.
According to the RTÜK expert report, Keçe had also said, “Fantasies are like spices. For example, you may make love to your spouse while imagining your neighbor; this is a fantasy. If this makes you more enthusiastic, if it pleases you more, it is not a bad thing.”
What is this doctor saying? Turkish woman don’t, would not, ever, do these things. Women in our society do not need terrible fantasies such as “imagining your neighbor” in their lives, ever. Turkish society is full of women who have their husbands and children at the center of their world. Even a suggestion is disturbing, RTÜK has implied. And I totally agree with them.
This is not against freedom of expression. Some bad and destructive thoughts and suggestions should be stopped before they reach the audience.
Seda Sayan’s program was also fined 20,000 liras in a show about brothels when she asked the women who worked there, “Do you also work there on your certain days? How many men do you have to be with a day? Do you sleep with your husbands also?”
Good for them. This is exactly what Turkish society needs to advance to a healthy and better society: parental discretion.